Dear dairy,
I know I haven’t written in a long time, but this adventure by the adge of the sea  really changed me. While I was taking the decisions, I could feel how it has already changing me. It molded me into a better self, a better shape of what I once was. The self confidence grew, the overthinking of what people saw when their eyes lingered on me dispersed, now I am not afraid to say that this is how I am. I did not care anymore, I gave up on stressing myself over everything for a few week, I had the chance to become a new person, to start over. My eyes were drowned in happiness and excitement rather than fear and depressing feeling. I was out of my cage, I could fly again.  I was a free bird with no restrainments to keep me down.
But the feeling was only for a moment, even if I did not want for it to end. I had to leave it there, as I came back home only little parts of positive energy that were flickering in my blood. After two weeks of being home and not feeling the same energy and happiness, I realized that I was not alright and that I have to regain that feeling, to uplift myself from the state of mind that destroy me in and out.
I have to realize what made me feel that way and start making it a state of mind. I have to do this all by myself, because otherwise this will be only  temporary and  I need it forever.

Last edited by 19FalFal (2018-01-26 12:58:45)