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You are here » Teacherovi's English Forum » Unpleasant » Dissapointment


Dissapointment

Posts 1 to 3 of 3

1

I remember that 3 years ago I went to a trip with my family in Greece.
We were visiting several beaches, and also had a great time in Greece, we knew that such a beautiful place wouldn't ever dissapoint us... But I was wrong.
One day, my family and I went to a "secret" beach, and when we arrived there, we noticed that the beach was empty, that there was no human in sight except for me and my family.
We advanced more on the beach, until we all hit the sea shore, and that's when we noticed what was truly going on.
There was a lot of litter on the beach sand, and a terrible smell was in the air, it wasn't even the smell of the sea, it was just the smell of the rubbish placed on the sea shore and sand.
I didnt expect that at all, we all knew that the beaches in Greece are so clean and beautiful and that there is nothing to worry about, but we were wrong... So wrong...
We left the place as soon as possible, the smell getting stronger and stronger until it reached the top of our head.
We went to another beach, this time better, with lots of people having fun into the clean, blue water of the sea.
Even though we went to another beach and had fun, we just couldn't let go of that dark image of a "paradise lost"

0

2

i think disappointment is spelled with double p not s
the essay itself feels very rushed, I think you should have spent more time on the twist: if you'd described a "perfect", clean beach beforehand, the reveal would have shocked more, and that is obviously the intended purpose.

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3

I think you've could done more to this text. You started well, but then u rushed things, you started like any normally text but then u started to describe the beach and then poof.... all story gone, I can see the topic in this text, which is disappointment, but text is not is it was supposed to be and u know it.

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