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You are here » Teacherovi's English Forum » Everyday stuff » Story of an injury


Story of an injury

Posts 1 to 4 of 4

1

Mom told me, after i woke up, that we were going to see an old friend of hers that lived in Valea Lupului and had 2 kids that ware almost my age.
    When we arrived at their house, the women was waiting ........... us with food. Then, after we ate ,me, the 8 years old girl, Maria, and her 9 years old brother, Ștefan , went outside to play and let our mothers to talk alone.
    After a while, a neighbour...... kid, friend of Stefan , came to play with us, in the garden. We started to get bored playing outside, with the ball, so we decided to go inside. Me and Maria went into her room to build castles from plasticine, and the boys wanted to join us. I disagreed because i was a stupid ten years old girl who thought that it was cool to not play with plasticine with boys. So I kept the door close.... with my hands. Stefan ran to the door with speed and pussed with his hand exactly in the door glass. One second later i looked at my left hand and saw a spot of red liquid on it. For a moment i thought that it couldn't be blood, but then i saw how the liquid leaked down , on the floor, and a big cut appeared. Then more and more blood started to leak from the back of the palm, it was almost gushin. Realising what was happening, realising that I was going to die, i started to scream for my mom to came and save me. She run upstairs with her friend and she immediately took my bleeding hand and pressed on the wound to make stasis, while the other woman was ringing to the ambulance.
    I was lucky that  I have arrived quickly to the hospital, where the wound was sewn.

adauga o concluzie in care comentezi cele intamplate sau spui reactia altora

Last edited by teacherovi (2019-03-30 08:23:12)

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2

The story was all right, but I feel like you could have said more about it. Like, overall, it was just a little bit plain and it had nothing to just make you feel like this is something you want to read. And it was kinda short. I feel like if you developed a little bit more it would have been a great story. But there is always room for improving

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3

That must've been scary. I loved the story, but in that moment of panic, you could have explained more how you felt and build up all those feelings. Can't wait to read more!

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4

What a scary injury for such a young child! I’m glad that everything turned out fine! Next time try to describe what you feel, for example, this story would have had a greater impact if you said what kind of turmoil of emotions you felt in that moment. Keep up the good work!

Last edited by Ihavenoideea (2019-09-22 19:44:33)

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